supergee | An immodest proposal

This year I have already lost two tires and much time and peace of mind to potholes, for which I have a scapegoat. I am informed that the pressure a vehicle puts on the road is proportional to the fourth power of its weight, and surely you have noticed that there are a lot of SUVs on the road.

With due respect to the small percentage of SUV drivers who really need a truck (technically, an SUV is a truck, except in situations where it is more advantageous to call it a car; did I mention that a lot of rich white guys own them?), there is much to be said for the belief that the main target audience is men who fear anatomical inadequacy. (

nellorat says that SUV stands for "small unit vindication.")

So I'm beginning to believe that Eldridge Cleaver was right, and male insecurity is so prevalent that we need a more direct approach--trousers displaying what Cleaver called the appurtenance (which can of course be suitably augmented). It would be gross to look at, but the economic and ecological advantages of going back to reasonable-sized cars could make it all worthwhile

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What's even worse is when some of 'em give their trucks balls, creating a sort of ideological vortex in which Cleaver and Rich Honky Dudeism react violently with one another in a series of massive explosions akin to those theorized to have sparked the birth of our own universe. The miracle of creation!